Nixta Sinks

This doesn't fit in the luggage...

I recently agreed to pay for a friend's internet order here in the US and get it over to Slovenia because they didn't have a way of paying for it over here.

I thought that a nice set of underwear for his girlfriend was a lovely gift and should be easy to take over even if he was setting her up for life as a lapdancer. Victoria's Secret is out - they make coats and shoes too. And like to give away large bags as freebies.

My brother also ordered some stuff from Macy's on Black Friday. But he's coming out here to collect that.

The picture you see to the right is me with three boxes. The two boxes behind me are his Macy's order. Interestingly, there's about the same number of things in each box. I guess that one is packaged by environmentally conscious staff whilst the other is packaged by angry Fuck You bastards in Texas. He'll have fun getting them back.

The third box on the right is one of three Victoria's Secret orders. One of the two other orders came in a box the same size. The second of the VS orders came in a box larger than the large Macy's one. So far I've managed to package the contents of the first two boxes into one suit carrier.

Now, I face two dilemmas.

1) How to get them into the EU without being stopped at customs. I've never been stopped so far, but I've always gone with one carry-on bag. I don't want to have to carry anything on because as Terry Gilliam sang all those years ago, I'm so worried about the baggage retrieval system they've got at Heathrow. If I can somehow fit them into two bags on the way out, I'll be good (I can put one bag into the other for the way back, or trust the JFK baggage retrieval system which, as far as I'm aware, no-one's written a catchy lament about yet).

2) How to send them from the US to Slovenia if I can't carry them over (which I don't think I can in their entirety) without rousing suspicion? A note to the effect of "Thanks for a great night - here are some things you left behind, and I took the liberty of sending you a coat I had left over as a gift." but that won't cover four coats, a pair of shoes, a VS garment bag, three sets of VS gift bags.

I can't really complain. It's my fault for assuming that VS only made underwear and so I didn't read the invoices before I agreed to have them shipped to me and didn't see that every other item was a winter coat of some description (they're quite nice really, and very good value for money).

I've also had my eyes opened to the wonders of internet shipping. I've been buying computer gear for too long, it seems. It appears to be too well packaged - clothing clearly has some way to go yet.

Now to unpack these boxes and secrete these things around the apartment where they won't be seen until I get to send them...