Nixta Sinks

TFS and I spent some time a while back considering the cast'n'blast. In short, the lazy man's way to hunt (be it domesticated caged bunnies in the woods, or a Bridge & Tunnel slapper in midtown). We considered it an original invention. A truly new concept that would sell like hot-cakes, if only murder were legalised.

"Original" Cast'n'blast concept

Now I see that I was wrong. So wrong.

A King Ashurbanipal of Assyria, eager to cotton on to the whole Gilgamesh Hero Status thing of the time, had himself protrayed as a lion slayer. Unfortunately for him he was a lazy coward of a bastard son-of-a-bitch and much preferred flaying people already tied up by others, in the dark, with his face pixellated.

A series of friezes depicting him as a ruthless and efficient killer of lions (both male and female) was commissioned to cement him in his people's minds as an icon. A comic-book hero like Judge Dredd or Bluto.

Man in lion costume, circa 645 BC

As an early P.R. exercise, it was a little too honest. The lions look doped up , and as the image above clearly shows, at least some were men dressed in comedy lion costumes rented from the circus.

But then comes the genius part. These ancient historical records show that the man invented the Cast'n'blast, years before it was reinvented by TSF and myself. The frieze depicts a caged lion being released by a servant directly into Ashurbanipal's waiting arrowshot. Click here for the full story...

Ashurbanipal never registered the patent!

Plebs were certainly easily impressed back then, I've got to say. These days, a cast'n'blast wouldn't paint anyone a hero (unless it was a paint gun full of superhero colours - blue, red, white and yellow tends to work).

Labels: Ashurbanipal, Cast'n'blast